In my daily ebay searches, I come across plenty of crap. WAY more crap than gems. In fact, yesterday, I found those shitty Bane and Converge bootlegs. Ugh. After that, I had a sour taste in my mouth.

That’s when I came across this PX EP. It’s an obvious bootleg. But check this description.

1987 Schism Records, this is a vintage US pressing – NOT a recent reissue – of the classic self titled 7″ EP from project X. This pressing has the fold open sleeve with lyrics on the inside, plain gray labels (no stamps), and Schism – 1 etched in the trail off. Fold open sleeve is EX, showing some handling/small creases. Vinyl grades about NM-, showing a few minor paper marks. Playback is solid throughout, while labels are crisp with no spindle wear. Buyer pays $7.50 priority or $4.00 media shipping in the US, $12.00 airmail overseas. Thanks for looking and good luck!

You’ll notice in this very cleverly worded description that the seller never claims this EP is a bootleg. So I fired off an email alerting him. It is somehow my civic duty as the guy behind HowsYourEdge? to do these things. Yeah, not sure how I feel it is my responsibility, but I do.

Here’s my first message:

This ep is a bootleg. The original press had white labels and small spindle hole, not the large hole. Peace.

And I received this immediate response:

Hey

I know, at no point did I say it was original.

John

Uh, wow? So it wasn’t like he was unaware it was a boot. He fully knows it is a boot. So I fire back.

At no point did you say it was NOT original. Seems shady to me.

Then, get ready for it, here comes his brilliant response:

Hi

Well, I wrote it was vintage – I have had it for 20 years. I described the label and the sleeve, so nothing shady going on there. Anyone who knows anything about the record knows what an original pressing goes for and looks like. Since this has about 5 watchers and is up to $15, I assume everyone gets this. Sorry to tell you how wrong you are…

John

Sorry to tell me how wrong I am? What the fuck?? What am I wrong about? It’s a boot. I’m right about that. He never mentions it is a boot. I’m also right about that. So where am I wrong?

Weak. Very weak. Don’t support crap like this. EVER.

Update: Apparently enough people complained and he updated his auction. I guess the complaints got through to him.

In case anyone was confused, this is not the original pressing. I thought that was clear since this is the gray label version with the large hole, not the white label version with the small center hole, but I have gotten a couple of questions on it.

Thought it was clear? Get the fuck out of here. It’d be clear if he had EXPLICITLY written “fan pressing” or “bootleg” in his description instead of attempting to re-craft The Old Man And The Sea with his description. Bah. Fuck it.